Jury Finds Ilhan Omar Guilty

The truth is right in front of you

Ilhan Omar has been found guilty in a federal court by a jury of her peers. She was on trial for several charges based on accusations thrown at her on the interwebs - 20 in fact. The charges included entering the country with a stolen identity at the cunning age of 10, marrying her brother, being a terrorist, tax fraud, and opposing the president. All these charges were exposed by online communities

The evidence for these was overwhelming in the form of words on the screens of millions, both in WordPress article and memes. Hundreds of each from proven, reliable sources online were presented into evidence. One such source was Judicial Watch, famous for backing Donald Trump’s “birtherism” campaign, which resulted in the defrocking of a president

Legal expert, Benza Cox Lance, gave us some insight into the probable thought processes of the jury:

“The jury saw memes. These are pictures with words on them! There is no more compelling evidence of fact in the world today. Once someone creates a meme - anybody can do it - the words placed on it become reality.

Add to that written articles from such fine Facebook publications as ‘We Love Donald Trump More Than Our Own Children ❤️” and “45 Is The Most Azzkickingest President Ever! He Is Sent By Lord Above”, and the charges could hardly be refuted.

Benza Cox Lance is the finest legal mind that two bucks and a pack of smokes can buy.

But it was really what the name of that last page refers to - Trump being annointed by God - that was the nail in the coffin. For Trump had also pointed the finger at Omar and god’s messengers don’t lie.”

Omar is now facing a minimum three day suspension up to a lifetime ban from Facebook for being the subject of too much fake news.


About Fired Writer 258 Articles
I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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