Usataters.com is a subsidiary of the “America’s Last Line of Defense” network of parody, satire, and tomfoolery, or as Snopes called it before they lost their war on satire: Junk News
Before you complain and decide satire is synonymous with “comedy”:
sat·ire ˈsaˌtī(ə)r noun: The use of humor, irony, exaggeration, OR ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
Everything on this website is fiction. It is not a lie and it is not fake news because it is not real. If you believe that it is real, you should have your head examined. Any similarities between this site’s pure fantasy and actual people, places, and events are purely coincidental and all images should be considered altered and satirical. See above if you’re still having an issue with that satire thing.
“Taters” are the conservative fans of America’s Last Line of Defense. They are fragile, frightened, mostly older caucasian Americans. They believe nearly anything. While we go out of our way to educate them that not everything they agree with is true, they are still old, typically ignorant, and again — very afraid of everything.
Our mission is to do our best to show them the light, through shame if necessary, and to have a good time doing it, because…old and afraid or not, these people are responsible for the patriarchy we’re railing so hard against. They don’t understand logic and they couldn’t care less about reason. Facts are irrelevant. BUT…they do understand shame.
About the Money (from the owner)
Things here at ALLOD have evolved over the years. There have been times when there has been a boatload of money made, and times of extreme famine. In general, this is a lucrative enterprise. As for the morality, what the fuck ever. I own a bunch of stuff, I’ve been building it for years, it makes me a nice living. Don’t like it? I don’t care. I’m all done trying to justify to libtaters why my work is allowed to be profitable. My tater audience is a commodity. Just ask Facebook. I won’t be apologizing. To anyone.
About Fake News
Call it whatever you like. Just don’t call it something it isn’t. Don’t email us asking for a “source.” Don’t inform us that our stories aren’t true. We have so many disclaimers now that the disclaimers are satirical. We make sure the words “satire” or “fiction” appear in EVERY category BEFORE the story. Twice.
If you can seriously read this stuff and think it can be passed off as real to reasonable people, you need to go out, right now, and buy a sense of humor and a clue.
Keep your poutrage to yourself. I sleep just fine.
~Christopher Blair, AKA Busta Troll