Goldberg Calls Trump Rally : ‘Klanapalooza’


In the quest to reopen America after a long and difficult few months dealing with the worldwide pandemic crisis, many patriotic supporters of *President Trump have been eager to get back out and meet with their own in public to experience the magic of a good old fashioned celebration of liberty.  When the news broke of the first major rally event to be held in Tulsa, Oklahoma on June 20th, tickets barely went on sale before they were gone.  But a certain host of “The View” doesn’t have much good to say about it.

No, not Meghan McCain. Although, she did call it : “a meeting of Horse-F*cker’s Anonymous”.

Award-winning actress and space bartender Whoopi Goldberg taped a segment of her hit television morning show “The View” yesterday to be aired Friday, and according to studio insider Sandy Batt, her prediction of the presentation was less sunny than Brett Kavanaugh’s tinder rating.

“Miss Goldberg wondered aloud why people were willing to put their lives in jeopardy for what amounts to, as she called it, ‘Klanapalooza’.  I think what she meant was that a great big rally for *President Trump is kind of like filling a stadium full of all the white characters from ‘Roots’. Her belief is that a group of people willing to expose themselves to a viral infection in the middle of a viral hotspot have to be really invested in their Klu Klux Klan-like devotion to their morbidly obese obermeister.  I suppose she’s right.  I mean, the whole thing is probably being sponsored by a human branding iron factory and gingivitis.”

“Oh, sorry, I can’t make this one Donnie. My agent says people already hate me enough just for wearing Garanimals.”

Reports have been trickling in of local Oklahoma mayors and officials who agree, and are none too pleased with such an irresponsible placement of soiled human Petri dishes on their turf.  However, since the administration released a no-fault waiver to be signed before the rally, it appears that it will be up to the pigs themselves to hose off their own infected slop.  God bless America!


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