Minnesota Schools To Teach Arabic Numerals

The truth is right in front of you

Minnesota’s Governor Baker, backed by his Education Minister Judy Tyabji, made a shocking announcement today regarding the future of learning in in the Land of a Bunch of Lakes.

They told the world today that Minnesota intends to start teaching with Middle Eastern methods. Starting in the fall semester, Minnesota schools will introduce Arabic numerals to math classes, beginning in the most elementary grades.  This means that children as young as six years old could be subjected to such indoctrination.

Tyabji gave us her reasons :

“Minnesotans want  to catch up with the rest of the world. This means our children need to learn Arabic numerals.

It’s also intended to have grocers sell goods of Arabic origin by their original names. Henceforth, lemons will be called “lemons”.

They tell me that such numerals are the way of the future and that the rest of the world has already gotten on board. Why should Minnesotan children have a lesser education than somebody in, say,  the UK, or France, or Canada, or Mexico! MEXICO! Even Mexico doesn’t use sticks, vees, els, and exes anymore! Did you hear me? Mexicans are smarter than us. Our classrooms are a thousand years behind! Maybe it’s about time we did something about that.”

If Minnesota does put this plan into action, the state will be the 50th to  actually teach in this way as all  others did from the moment of independence. Before that even. Centuries. It’s been a long time. They’re numbers. That we use everyday. Get a hold of yourself.

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I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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