Busted - Freshman Dem Senator is Undocumented


He’d been trying to keep a low profile, even during his entire run for Senate as the candidate for Texas’s 12th district. When he won a surprise victory for the Democrats in the 2020 election, the party was overjoyed to have not only a representitive Latino voice for that state, but a smart and capable progressive to push their agenda in a usually red area.

Now it seems that Democrat senator Matt Santos is in mucho agua caliente. According to whistleblower Sandy Batt of the Dallas Morning Queef, Santos is not a legal citizen of the United States, and therefore not qualified to hold his office.

Federal investigators believe a key part of Santos’s ineligability has to do with his existence as a fictional character portrayed by actor Jimmy Smits on the television show The West Wing.  However, some critics of the 2020 election who are completely irrational and take the words of bulbous professional lifelong con men and crackhead pillow salesmen think otherwise.

“This guy is a Demon-rat”, a 99-year old Trump-supporting walking fungus told investigator Joe Barron in a Facebook group called : “No Amnesty, No Immigration Reform.”  “The law doesn’t apply to them because Soros and Antifa pay to burn down buildings while there never held re ponsible and are for killing babbies but one day they will half to meet they’re makers to and stand in judgement AMEN vote red.”

Police are distancing themselves from the case in the event that Smits once again brings out the Tommyknockers.

Jimmy Smits has not yet commented on the scandal, and seems to be satisfied that he is part of Star Wars canon. He did, however, cause a great amount of sadness when he died on NYPD Blue.  I was crushed. And nobody wants to be followed up by Rick Schroeder.

How could such a thing happen in the United States of America?  Are a lot of people so ball-shrivelingly stupid that they could fall for this satire as real YET again?  With your average Trump nut - the answer is a resounding “Oh hell yes.”

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