Failed Democrat Beto O’Rourke has been exposed as one of 11 conspirators charged by the Secret Service today with conspiracy to commit treason and murder. According to a top-secret source inside the West Wing, the group was exposed after an investigation into some shady past behavior by Beto himself.
Beto’s more recent escapades suggest that he may have been involved in a plot to kill East Coast rapper Art Tubolls over a similar blue shirt. Something about the little guy on the pocket being a custom thing. He was also heavily involved with the plot to kill Tony Sorvino and Kirk Douglas.
According to sources inside the O’Rourke Presidential campaign, he has a history of using violence to get his way. Even his little brother, Alpho O’Rourke, says he needs to be watched closely:
“My brother has always made secret plans with friends to hurt people. You can’t trust him. He has a history that goes way back. If he’s allowed to continue in politics, he’ll be the next Hillary Clinton”
Beto hasn’t responded to the allegations and is currently a fugitive from justice.
The lead investigator in the case says the Secret Service won’t rest until they’ve put him behind bars. But that has the whole world wondering…Where’s Beto? Some think he slipped back across the border into Mexico, where his mother was born, and from there he may have gone to Northern Ireland, the most dangerous non-Muslamic place on Earth.
Whether or not they can get him on the charges, Beto O’Rourke’s political career is over. Sorry about that, big guy. Maybe next time you can be on the right side of history.