President Trump’s Twitter followers got a couple of confusing messages this morning from the Commander in Chief’s account, seemingly pertaining to the new Avengers movie and blatantly dropping spoilers to it’s plot and closely guarded secrets.
An anonymous White House intern explained the missives to a journalist at the Washington Queefer :
“Yeah, he was all up in everybody’s ass about wanting to see the Avengers movie everyone’s talking about. We kinda figured, you know, he’s an idiot, and that wouldn’t end well. So me and another guy, we got him a DVD copy of that old Avengers movie from 1998. Says ‘Avengers’ right on the front. Bingo. Like a douche, though, he still had to tweet about it.”
The President was apparently none the wiser to the elaborate ruse, the likes of which, insiders admit, is common within the administration. For instance, staffers have several times ignored Trump’s requests for new briefcases since an episode where he mistook one for a “giant sandwich” and had to be separated from the item via electric shock. Sometimes the real superheroes wear an intern’s jacket instead of a cape.