Pelosi Apologizes to American Jews For ‘President’s Ignorant Comments’


Speaker Nancy Pelosi took it upon herself to apologize to the nation’s entire Jewish population this afternoon, calling President Trump’s remarks calling into question their “loyalty” when voting Democratic: “ignorant, incorrect, and imbecilic.”  The statement marks Pelosi’s progress towards the alphabetically alliterative middle of her tirades, following up on last week’s description of Trump as : “A hypocritical harridan-humping hatemonger.”

“Vividly vilifying very vicious vain varmints. Indeed.”

Trump’s comments, meant to boost his party’s standing among Jewish Americans has, ironically, energized the anti-semetic wing of the Republicans as well as internationally.  Holocaust deniers and vicious conspiracy theorists have become more outspoken.  Good work, King.

“This is too weird. MY copy of the 2112 album is black and red.”

Because much of his administration are either blubbering sycophants or morons the President chose himself who couldn’t recognize bad form if they were sitting at a chimpanzee ballet, Pelosi seems to have to be the adult in the room who is forced to make these declarations.  We’ll see what happens in another week, when presumably Trump will anger yet more Americans and be imminently beatable by a cardboard cutout of Abe Vigoda running against him in 2020.

Be the first to comment