Mattel Introduces AOC Barbie Doll

The truth is right in front of you

Mattel routinely releases new Barbie dolls in different shades and emulating women from different walks of life. They generally do so for women worthy of admiration or adoration but it seems that they have strayed from that model. Yesterday, the doll creators introduced a doll that is more worthy of scorn and disgust. They introduced a “Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Barbie” and nobody is happy about it.

The new figurine shows Ocasio-Cortez with her hair tied back, wearing glasses, and clad in a long overcoat - a typical AOC get-up. What is not typical is a major corporation throwing total support behind such a minor league, controversial, first term candidate, such as Mattel has done with Cortez. They’ve even attached a tag line to the doll which reads “AOC. Perhaps the greatest representation of America that has ever existed.”

Mattel spokesdog, Sasha Sandhu, expounded on the virtues of the democrat rep in a recent press conference:

“AOC is the perfect embodiment of American values. Her thoughts are the thoughts of all. She supports the people, not the corporations. She wants to see the return to this country of a strong middle class. She wants hard work to be rewarded and greed to be rightly punished.

We’ve recreated all of those fine ideals and attributes in an eight inch doll.”

A widespread call for a boycott of Mattel was already in place after their introduction of a doll in the image of criminal upstart, Rosa Parks. This new addition will surely add to the furor.

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I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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