California Abortion Cloning Company Reports Steady Profits


Wedding together the tech industry with the growing pro-choice movement seemed like a risky business venture.  Well, after last week’s grand IPO debut and a company valuation in the billions, owner and CEO Justin Hurmouf has quite a bit to crow about.  His abortion cloning company, “Changed My Mind” or C.M.M. is making waves in a new and exciting field.  Hurmouf gave a brief statement to Fortune 500 :

“What i realized watching the Star Wars movie ‘Attack of the Clones’ wasn’t just that George Lucas lied when he said he had nine parts already written and planned out.  It was that cloning is here, it’s real, and it can be a second chance.

There are times when a woman choses to abort an unwanted pregnancy.  As is her God-given right.   But what if she changes her mind afterwards and wants that baby back? Baby back baby back?  Well that’s where we come in.  Changed My Mind can clone that fetus back exactly how it would have been.  We have hundreds of happy mothers already extolling our virtues.   They say only God can give life.  Well guess what. God just got owned, muthafuc*ka.”

Hurmouf formerly worked at Planned Parenthood as a pincers sanitizing agent.

C.M.M. is also impressing stockholders with a new focus from its R&D department, a program tentatively titled : “Better Than New”, which involves genetically manipulating the cloned child for optimum advantages.  Want a baby with six fingers? Extra large breasts?  A perfectly round head?  Welcome to the future.

Trial-versions are already available.

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