LeBron James Busted Running Four Illegal Sweat Shops in South America

LeBron James, made famous when he said some pretty mean things about Kyle Rittenhouse, has found himself in a bit of hot water. According to a news story out of South America, James has been running illegal sweatshops, presumably to manufacture his lines of clothing and shoes.

The NBA changed the rules on marketing during Michael Jordan’s era, when the famous ex-player threatened to leave the league and take his Nike shoes with him if they didn’t allow him to market his own brand.

Following the guidelines set by the NBA at a fiction-finding conference in Madrid, James purchased his own logo from Nike and started producing cheap shoes. Nowadays, he’s raking in over $4 billion a year, none of which is being taxed.

How? He’s doing it all under the guise of “charity.” According to LeBron’s foundation website, the sweatshops don’t exist, and the whole thing is a made-up lie. Yeah, sure it is, Lebron. Sorry, chief, but we do our own research around here.

The official James Foundation spokesman, Joe Barron, said the allegations are ridiculous, and that we should stop writing things like this.

“Seriously, guys?” he asked, “He owns his own line of shoes? You’re the same assholes that told the world Michael Jordan left Nike and took his anti-gravity juice to New Balance. What’s wrong with you?”

There is no actual record of our findings anywhere, and most of this is our own theory, but still he didn’t have to be so mean about it.

Jerk. God bless America.

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